We only become fluent in anything when we no longer need to think about what we are doing.
Any writer will tell you that the most important part of writing is the writing. That counts no matter what kind of writing it is, from technical to fiction. Practice separates the successful from the novice.
It’s also true that familiarity breeds contempt. You have to accept that you’ll hate what you love, over and over again. Nevertheless, we must pursue it
I loved making computer programs from the first time I ever wrote a goto statement. I never thought I was any good at it until I got a job doing it. I’ve always felt insecure and not good enough — like people were merely pandering, flattering, and placating — for as long as I can remember.
Be good at what you want to do. Stop thinking. Just do it.